By Ariel Reynolds, ACES Extension Daily
In a world filled with cyber bullying, instant access to any picture, video or comment, parents’ role to build healthy self-esteem in their children is more vital than ever.
Shannon Kish, a regional family and child development agent with the Alabama Cooperative Extension System, explains why parents need to foster healthy self-esteem in their children and provides strategies for parents to utilize.
What is self-esteem and why is it important?
“Self-esteem is best described as a feeling of self-worth,” Kish explains. “Children who have a high self-esteem tend to have protective factors that create resiliency. These protective factors help children avoid peer pressure, like drugs and alcohol.”
Although peer pressure tends to be more prevalent during adolescence, it is important that parents begin creating these positive attitudes in their children from a very early age.
“Building a strong sense of self-worth begins early in a child’s development,” Kish said. “Fostering self-esteem, self-worth and self-awareness should begin immediately. When children are infants, they need to feel loved, safe and secure. Parents do this by ensuring the child’s needs are met and as the child gets older, they begin to explore the world outside of the protective womb of mom and dad.”
Kish explained that children need to get to know themselves. They need to explore and understand what they are good at, what they are not so good at, what interests them and what goals they have for themselves. Parents play a critical role in building a child’s self-awareness.
“Healthy self-esteem is like a child’s armor against the challenges of the world,” Kish explained. “Children who know their strengths and weaknesses and feel good about themselves seem to have an easier time handling conflicts and resisting negative pressures.”
Strategies to build healthy esteem in children
Kish provided five helpful strategies to foster healthy esteem in children.
Tip 1.
Meet children’s needs from infancy. Children begin learning and developing their understanding of the world from the first day they are born. When an infant cries, the parent soothes the child and meets the need at that time which builds trust and ultimately affects how children view themselves.
Tip 2.
Encourage children to try new things. Encouraging a child to continue at things they are really good at and to continue trying at things they might struggle with are just some of the ways parents can help children get to know themselves and develop an “I can do this” attitude.
Tip 3.
Reinforce positive aspects of the child and maintain an overall positive attitude. Providing positive support through pro-social activities (sports, clubs, church, etc.) can help boost self-esteem.
Tip 4.
Have honest discussions about the influences of the media. For older children who are beginning to face the world of media, it is important to be open in discussing these influences with children.
Tip 5.
Watch how you correct. Parents want to help their children be their best. They also want to ensure their children’s safety. Sometimes, however, these strong desires to protect children from failure and embarrassment can hinder the development of self-esteem or self-awareness. For example, if a child is painting a picture of an apple and chooses to paint the apple purple instead of red, it is easy for the parents to want to correct the child. Correcting the child in this manner can hinder creativity and actually cause the child to doubt their abilities.
Additionally, The University of Missouri Extension Office suggests the following strategies to build self-esteem and self-awareness.
- Listen and Acknowledge: Listen to your child. What are the thoughts and feelings behind the words?
- Structure for Success: Set up your child for success, not failure.
- Reinforce: Let your child know he or she is lovable and capable.
- Reasonable Control: Allow your child to have some control.
- Model: Build your own self-esteem.
For more information, visit the ACES website.
Extension Daily is the official blog of the Alabama Cooperative Extension System (ACES). ACES operates as the primary outreach organization for the land-grant functions of Alabama A&M and Auburn Universities. Reprinted with permission.
Photo credit: family.lovetoknow.com
